FOR COUPLES WHO ARE FIGHTING OR DRIFTING APART...
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Watch this 15-minute video to learn why typical couples fight and break up, and how to break that cycle, resolve arguments, reconnect, and build the life of your dreams.
Why 97% of Couples Eventually Split Up...
Are you suffering in your relationship?
You’re not alone. About 85% of typical couples don’t make it past the first two years. Only 6% last five years. Then about half of all marriages end in divorce.
And it’s not always rainbows and unicorns for those that last. A lot of them are unhappy, just getting by.
The primary reason is that we were never taught how to effectively recover from all the disagreements, complaints, and hurts that naturally come up in every relationship, let alone the skills to make our relationships stand the test of time.
All these unresolved issues grow and fester. Not only do we not know how to repair things, we don’t even know how to connect and be friends with all these conflicts hanging over our heads.
So things just keep escalating. Or, we keep avoiding. Either way, it’s very painful.
The other reason is simply that life gets in the way and we stop bonding, and we just slowly drift further apart.
Either way… eventually we can’t take it any more.
How to Repair Your Relationship:
Here’s how Harmonic Couples do it:
The 3% of couples that stay together without help do these things intuitively… The rest of us need a system.
The good news is that if there is the desire to stay together and willingness to put in some time each week, nearly any relationship can thrive again with a repair plan and support.
1. Resolve Issues With Structure
We have a proven structure based in Nonviolent Communication mediation techniques to resolve issues and even old hurts.
You just follow the steps to hear and understand each other, and to co-create agreements that work…even when you disagree.
You’ll start with easy topics to improve your connection and relationship, and to gain skills and confidence.
As you experience the relief of actually resolving issues, you might even start to look forward to those discussions, because you know you have a way to handle any conflict!
2. Create a Connection Routine
It feels good when we start to see each other as friends and start bonding again.
You’ll get exercises to find and share things you appreciate, to practice talking with each other, to demonstrate understanding, to frequently and intentionally show that you care about each other, and to have some fun together every week.
Small steps lead to big changes.
3. Proactively Move Towards a Vision
Once you can resolve issues and are becoming more bonded every day, you’ll likely both be excited for your future.
The next step is to start visualizing what your ideal life together will look like, and to create action plans to get there.
Our comprehensive system guides you to continually and intentionally make your life together better and better.
What Would Learning This Do For Your Relationship?
(This is just a taste of what we help you with.)
How to End Fights & Arguments:
- How to stop arguments in their tracks and remember to use the framework for resolving issues.
- How to start conversations about issues in a way that doesn't trigger your partner's fight/flight response.
- How to reframe issues and complaints into opportunities so your partner actually wants to talk about them.
How to Listen:
- How to not get triggered or have some other reactive response when your partner brings up a complaint.
- How to respond when you don't agree with your partner in a way that doesn't start a fight.
- How to really hear your partner, so they don't have the need to bring up the same issue again and again.
How to Resolve Issues:
- How to deal avoid compromises when you have different ideas on how to proceed in life.
- How to make doable agreements with your partner that they actually want to follow through with.
- How to manage broken agreements without making things even worse.
How to Heal From Hurts:
- How to develop empathy for yourself and your partner, so you can hear hearts instead of expressions of pain.
- How to mourn the impact together of actions that were painful, instead of sharing anger, blame, and punishment.
- How to do a productive redo of old arguments, to share from the heart what was really going on at the time.
How to Say and Hear No:
- How to make sure things are done with a strong "yes", not out of energy that creates resentment over time.
- How to say "no", without anxiety about your partner hearing that you don't care about them and their needs.
- How to hear your partner's "no" without hearing that they don't care about you and your needs.
How to Share Appreciation:
- How to frequently find things you appreciate, even if things are pretty disconnected when you're starting off.
- How to let them know they matter, in a way that really connects deeply so they experience being really seen.
- How to respond to appreciation so your partner knows how it felt when you're seen for what they enjoy about you.
How to Increase Your Bond:
- How to start bonding again, even if you've been unable to connect for a long time.
- How to continually connect in little ways to keep building your intimacy and showing that you like each other.
- How to have deeper conversations that don't fall flat, so you can really know and connect to each other.
How to Build The Life of Your Dreams:
- How to visualize ways to improve every single aspect of your life, together as a team.
- How to make realistic action steps to continually make small steps towards your shared life vision.
- How to quickly track your progress, so you can notice how much you have to celebrate and appreciate.
Become a Harmonic Couple:
Our site and community is part of a registered not-for-profit created to help people like you to learn and practice these skills, and to support you as you repair your relationship.
Our newly created Facebook group gives you FREE access to a growing library of resources to start you on your journey and access to people who can help you every step of the way.
Imagine what your life might look like, in just a few months from now, as you learn and use these skills!
Harmonic Mediation Society is a not-for-profit helping people reconcile differences, develop deep mutual understanding, and co-create strategies to care for each other’s needs.
BC Canada Registered Not-for-profit Number 71406 5000 BC0001
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